Tuesday, 29 September 2009

Freetannia extends MK influence.

Following on the royal visit of King Richard Frobisher and his wife Daphne, the Sovereign State of Freetannia continues to extend its influence in Milton Keynes.

Over the last few days Freetannia's previously well-heeled Freetannian bankers visited the MK Fringe exhibition in the local shopping arcade. As well as hoping to pick up the odd art bargain they also appealed to the citizens of MK for financial assistance to help our 'Rich Beggars' as they have become known.


Fannie, Charles and Bertie (photo: Legge for FringeMK)

The same event saw a visit from from Freetannia's national athletic team who staged a World Record Attempt at Apathy – unfortunately this event finished early due to lack of interest.


(photos: Legge for FringeMK)

A couple of days later a minor drama ensued when a party of Freetannian ramblers became lost in the depths of the shopping mall. The Freetannian and MK authorities feared the worst but happily, thanks to directions from friendly MK natives the Lost Ramblers were found safe and well, though they continue to deny being lost in the first place.


Caroline, Colin and Susan (photo: Legge for FringeMK)

The creation of artificial sperm has been in the news lately. A little-known fact however is that Freetannia has become the first nation to begin to explore the possibilities with two Freetannian men becoming the first males to become pregnant by a woman. Controversy has surrounded the event however, as both claim the same woman as the 'father'. All three individuals visited MK as a group and were said to be very taken with the local 'Mothercare' branch. They did however feel that the range of male clothing could be improved.

On Monday this week final year Performing Arts students at Milton Keynes College applied en masse to become Freetannian citizens. During a seminar on street theatre hosted by the Comic Character Creations company students, who had previously shown lively enthusiasm, suddenly declared their allegiance to Freetannia and began frantically seeking directions from their colleagues. They finally took part in a mass World Record Attempt at Apathy as a demonstration of their loyalty. Unfortunately, like the official Freetannian event, this too was cancelled for lack of commitment. A spokesperson for Freetannia commented that the country welcomed educated immigrants but hadn't gotten round to doing anything about it yet.



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