Kidderminster Arts Festival

Nigel Andrews, BBC Freetannian Correspondent, reporting to you live from Kidderminster.

Now this is the way to run an arts festival, in my impartial opinion! Comic Character Creations, entertainers to HM The King of Freetannia - take note! The relocation ceremony in Milton Keynes awaits... London 2012 should also have a quiet look!

Three local groups of Freetannia ventured to the Kidderminster Arts Festival yesterday, having been invited to share their artistic skills with the local residents.

Flashing
The Hairy Flashers' skillshare was very successful, not least in that it managed to open up lines of communication between residents, shopping centre managers and police. Good to see Freetannians doing their bit for community relations.

All demographics were duly flashed and strong reactions noted.

It has also attracted the attention of some bloggers.

The World Record Attempt at Apathy
A complete success, in that absolutely NO-ONE bothered to join in. Most people didn't even bother to watch which was a very good result. In fact, the Freetannian Society of Apathetics gave up fairly quickly as they couldn't be bothered either. In fact only two of them bothered to turn up in the first place.

Begging for the Rich
This raised a grand total of £3.37 for the Rich Beggars of Freetannia, and with the Freetannian currency being so strong at the moment equates to approximately ten million Freetannian pounds. More than enough to have the yacht varnished.

This is Nigel Andrews, hoping for a posting to anywhere but Freetannia.

Trafalgar Square

Greetings from The Freetannian Chapter of the Rambling Association! No 'right to roam' issues in this country, thanks to King Dickie.

We set forth for Cambridge last week, charged with the task of mapping the University of Cambridge (and all the real pubs!) as a template for the new University of Freetannia, once we have relocated to Milton Keynes.

Unfortunately we took a wrong turn (the map had a hole in it!) and ended up in Trafalgar Square! There seemed to be some sort of festival on but we ignored it.

Keen to make the best of a bad situation we decided to map the square so we can better it in Freetannia, complete with Dickie's Column!

Below are Susan and Colin half way to the summit! Norris is behind the lens. Not sure where Barbara, Caroline and Keith are... Oops!